After an extended break of writing, i’ve felt called back and the doubt that has been in my mind is the question “what makes you so special?” so in this post i’ll be exploring that question and discussing where our self worth and identity lies. Continue reading “What makes me so special?” An understanding of self worth.
Hi everyone, I just thought I’d do a quick update and once again plug the youtube channel! So if you … Continue reading Quick update
So with this whole lockdown thing, I’ve decided to do something different. I’m now making video content alongside the blog! … Continue reading Something different?
So a couple of weeks back, I wrote about 5 songs to listen to during this time of isolation, (you can find a link to that post here 5 Worship/Christian songs to get you through isolation.) with the goal of somehow trying to keep the focus on God during this troubling time, well with the isolation still in full effect at the time of writing, I thought it’d be a good idea to do a follow up to that post! I’ll provide links to each song, so feel free to check them out! Continue reading “5 more Worship/Christian songs to get you through isolation.”
So, let’s talk about the Coronavirus. I’m sure everyone is tired of talking about the outbreak and, I get it, it’s been a real challenging time. It’s been a time of panic, not just because of the virus, but everything surrounding it, from the closure of pretty much all public spaces, to the imposed isolations and quarantines, and let’s not forget the stockpiling of scared shoppers, making the supermarkets so much more stressful than ever before. The world is in a state of panic and despair and it’s understandable, but it’s times like this we need to turn it back round to focus on God. Continue reading “Corona-virus: holding onto hope.”
So today’s post is gonna be a little different from the stuff I normally post. But with the whole COVIOD-19 … Continue reading 5 Worship/Christian songs to get you through isolation.
So I wasn’t actually going to write anything this week. I keep putting this off, finding excuses not to write another blog. That’s for a number of reasons, some of them are fairly simple, other commitments, not feeling inspired. Others are more personal. But I started this blog with the intent of walking alongside those struggling. Life after Darkness is more than just a title of a blog to me. It’s a mindset of being able to get through the hardest times in life, and seeing the goodness of God in those times.
I am not a shining example of Christianity, I’m just as broken as anyone else you’ll find, I’m certainly no saint (even if I share my name with one) but something I pride myself on, is honesty. And to be honest, I’m struggling. Continue reading “Still and small.”
2020 has been a really weird year, not bad, but weird. I don’t know what God has in store for me going onwards, and it’s this feeling of uncertainty that’s really got me thinking, is it so important to know where I’m going as long as I’m moving forward with Christ? Continue reading “Purpose and direction: Enjoying the journey”
my point here, however, isn’t just to complain about my lot in life, no it’s something that I think is far more helpful than that.
My point is it’s okay to not be okay. Continue reading It’s okay to not be okay.
2019 has been a really weird year for me. I have so much to be grateful for but to call it an easy year would be simply false. For every moment of joy, there’s been a hardship, for every smile, there’s been a tear, for every moment of clarity, I’ve felt just as lost. but this isn’t a post of discontent, more one of realizing that, actually there’s no shame in being lost. Continue reading “There’s no shame in being lost.”
So in the last post, I went through King Kalidoscope’s latest album “Zeal” (check it out if you haven’t yet, the link will be at the end) and it got me thinking, what comes next? After we lose the cynicism, when we come back to that place of child-like faith, where do we go next? After getting back to that place of passion and, well, zeal, how do we keep pushing on in our everyday lives, in a way that shows the glory of the Lord? Continue reading “Be the change you want to see.”
Before we get into the breakdown, I’m extremely proud to announce that my good friend and brother in Christ, Ian is now officially a part of the page, he will be helping with editing mainly (one of my weaker points I think) he’s written a number of excellent guest posts for Life After Darkness, so it was a great honour to have him become a part of the page! And I honestly can’t wait to see where God decides to lead this blog.
If you’ve followed this blog for any length of time, you’ll know how much of an impact Kings Kaleidoscope has made upon me and my faith. I mean, the name of this blog was inspired by one of their songs, and ever since the release of “Zeal” I knew I had to do a breakdown of the album. The issue for me was timing; I wanted to write this at the right time. A lot has gone on in my life in the past few weeks, not all of it good, but all of it necessary. Considering the themes of this incredible album, I think this is the perfect time. Continue reading “A breakdown of “Zeal” by Kings Kaleidoscope (part 1)”
Last week was my latest journey to the conference known as “New wine United”, and there’s a few things I need to mention before we get into today’s topic.
I wasn’t even supposed to be at United this year. God, however, had other plans – and to New wine I went. To be honest, I was actually really nervous about this year’s conference. It was the first year that I was basically the only person in my age group as most of my friends in that age group, for one reason or another, couldn’t come.
It was also the first year since attending United that I hadn’t camped with my original church. I instead went with the church I’ve been serving at for a number of years now. So it was really a strange year. Yet, I can say that it’s been a real blessing of a week honestly! Last bit of admin stuff before I get started properly; the rundown of the album “Zeal” by Kings Kaleidoscope should be up by the end of the month, I really want to make an effort to get back into investing in this page, something that I’ve been neglecting for the past year or so.
So it’s been a while since we’ve had a guest post, but my good friend Ian felt inspired to write a piece, and he’s very kindly offered to share it here! you can find a link to his page here Ardentword and a link to the song that inspired this piece here Singing like a bird-Benjamin James. Just before his post begins i wanted to say sorry for the lack of content this year, i should be posting more regularly in the coming weeks, life is just a bit full on right now! Anyway, enjoy this brilliantly written and insightful post, and may God bless you! Continue reading “Guest post: Like a Bird”
So this is something that’s become something of a tradition upon the release of a new Kings Kaleidoscope album/EP. And at the time of writing, “Zeal” has been out for one day, i may do a full run-through of my thoughts on the album as a whole at a later date, (spoiler, it’s going to be very positive) but today, for the first time in a while, i’ve felt the call to write. In this post, i’m going to be going to be picking apart the lyrics of one of my favourite songs on this album, “backwards” and explaining why this song has spoken to me in the way it has. Obviously, you should probably listen to “Backwards” before continuing on with this post, so here’s the link just in case! (“Backwards”) Continue reading ““Backwards” by Kings Kaleidoscope: a call to the disenchanted”
2018 has been a really strange year to be honest. But at this current moment, i’m not sure if that’s a good thing exactly. It’s been a “balanced” year for lack of a better term, for everything good, there’s been a hardship to go alongside it, for every step forward, there’s been at least one step back, leading me to the conclusion that i haven’t progressed in any way, despite the amount of evidence to the contrary of this conclusion. Continue reading “Loss,Lows/Highs,Hope.”
I have a habit of losing sight of hope. It’s not a case of losing faith, or not trusting in the goodness of God, but more of a blindness that shuts out all hope. It overwhelms my vision, to the point where I know that nothing will get better, and that I’m destined to remain trapped in that cloud of hopelessness. Well, i think i know anyway. Until i take a step back and realise how much of an overreaction that actually is. Continue reading “Build your life: Hold on to hope.”
After i finished last weeks post (if you haven’t read it yet you can find it here: Break the circle, claim your confidence.) i felt God tell me to make this more of a constant theme on this blog, well, at least for now. In this series, i’m going to be documenting my journey of self-worth, and sharing some of the lessons that i’ve learnt.
One of the things that i’ve had to learn to cope with is, that i’m not perfect. And that no one thinks that i am. Sounds obvious right? You just need to look at the frequency of the blog this year to see that i’m not! However it’s not as simple as “i’m not perfect, so i’m bound to make mistakes” or at least, it isn’t for me.
I hold myself to an unrealistic standard, one that i don’t hold others to. I expect to get everything right in one try, no matter how out of my depth i may be, or how hard the task at hand is. I expect perfection from myself in social situations, despite the fact i’m not the most social person out there. i guess the point i’m trying to make is, failure is one of my biggest fears. Continue reading “Build your life part 1 : Give yourself some grace.”
I am wanted, i am loved, i am talented, i am important, and i do matter. And so do you. Continue reading Break the circle, claim your confidence.
So it’s been a while since i’ve written something, there’s numerous reasons for that. But if i’m honest, the main reason has been issues of anxiety. And considering its mental health awareness week at the time of writing, what better time than now to get back into writing?
A lot has happened in my life since the last time i posted all the way back in February, i’ve gained friends and i’ve lost some. I’ve had moments of divine clarity and of absolute emotional devastation. In the case of some of these events, i will go into detail in some future posts, but right now all i’ll say is, it’s been an eventful few months. Continue reading “How Andy Mineo’s “I ain’t done” helped me face my anxiety.”
“If you are able to work on yourself and improve to a point where you are able to get what you once wanted, and be able to turn that down because it isn’t right for you, that’s true maturity”
2018 has already been a year full of changes and improvement, or at least an attempt at the latter, if i look back on last year and where i am in my thinking and my faith, it’s like night and day, and i may have a long way to go but i can’t wait for the journey ahead. And part of this journey so far is actually making an effort to work on my weight by attending the gym. Continue reading “What God taught me about maturity”
“if someone says to you, there’s some dead wood here and it needs to be burnt off, and you say to yourself, some of this is still alive, so when this burns it’s going to hurt, no kidding. But maybe the thing that emerges in its place is something better and i think, this is the secret of humans, this is what we’re like. Unlike any other creature is that, we can let our old selves die and let our new selves be reborn, and that’s what we should do”. Continue reading Burning dying wood and the importance of letting go.
Wow, i hadn’t realised how long it’d been since my last post, i’m sorry for my lack of commitment to the schedule. Advent is always a busy time for me, and sometimes i get carried away in the festivities, not leaving much time for anything else. But i thought i should get at least one more post out before the new year. And it’s a subject that we must hold dear in this season.
I love Christmas time. I love the lights, the extra church services, the encouragement to spend time with those we hold dear. All of these things are a huge part of Christmas for me. Yet, the more i think about it, the more i realise there’s something missing from this list. Sure, i mentioned church services, but i do forget to mention the reason there’s so many over this time of year. And i’ve noticed a lot of us do. Continue reading “Christ in Christmas”
The summer of 2017 was amazing for me for a number of reasons. I got the chance to go away to a Christian festival for a week, i managed to meet a member of one of my favourite Christian bands, i was confirmed, i got a chance to visit one of my best friends, and so much more. Today i want to focus on the first of these amazing experiences, more importantly, what was spoken over us at this event.
There seemed to have been a theme running through my time at New Wine United this year, and that theme is one of the big words found in the church, a word that is spoken over every generation it seems, it’s a word that has the power to drive many of us in the body, and a word that we seem to strive for. This word is a simple one, but an important one. This word is Revival. Continue reading ““The R word.””
So this wasn’t going to be this weeks topic. I had an idea planned out for a piece on boasting in the glory of Christ, not in our own power, and who knows? This could be a topic i come back to in the future, but i felt the Lord push me towards another topic, one that is close to my heart, and one that i really feel Him putting on my heart, and who am i to question the Lord? With that being said, let’s get onto this weeks topic. Continue reading “Though you slay me: looking for his light.”
So, if you’ve been following the theme of these posts over the last couple of weeks, you’ve noticed that i’ve been talking a lot about putting the Lord before our political leanings, well, we’re continuing this theme in a way. However, this week isn’t focusing on our politics, nor our moral compass. This week we will be focusing on our understanding of some of the wonderful things that the Lord can do in our lives, while still focusing on him. Continue reading “Seeking his face”
“We can’t afford to be drowning each other in an ocean of ideology when we’re called to bring people to the ship. It’s hard enough to keep our eyes set on the ship in the first place, the last thing we need to be doing is holding down someone else’s head beneath the waves because they’re heading in a different direction.” Continue reading The ocean of ideology
It’s been a while since i wrote a post, i don’t have some extravagant excuse, nor some extremely important reason, i’ve been letting my focus slip from this blog over the past couple of weeks and for that i’m sorry. Be assured it’s not due to a lack of interest, it’s more due to a lack of concentration on my part, but be assured, that i haven’t given up on this blog, and i’m still grateful for everyone that does read these posts, it means the world to me. Now, with that out-of-the-way, let’s get on with today’s post.
Last weekend, a couple of friends and i went camping. Now, anyone that knows me knows this isn’t exactly my idea of a “good weekend” but this weekend wasn’t just good, it was great. A lot of good conversations were had, and a lot of laughs were shared, and overall, it was just a brilliant weekend. But there was one conversation we had that really got me thinking, and i knew i had to write about how it made me feel. Continue reading “Unchanging as flame.”
First of all, i want to apologise for the lack of a post last week. I’d just got home from a mini vacation to the city of Sheffield to visit a good friend, and when i got home, i really didn’t have the energy to write anything, it may not be a good reason, but it’s an honest one. Which leads into the topic of this weeks post perfectly!
There seems to be a running theme of transparency not only in terms of my emotions, but in terms of my faith. I’m terrible at being honest with my feelings. If i’m feeling depressed, i have a tendency to shut myself away, if someone has hurt or upset me, i have a compulsion to shut down rather than resolve the conflict. It’s an issue that i need to confront, maybe even in time, overcome it. But it’s the second part of this that’s got me thinking. Continue reading “Transparent faith.”
So at the time of writing, “The beauty between” (the newest Kings kaleidoscope mixtape) is not even a day old, and though it is different to the previous instalments from my favourite Christian band, it’s still an amazing album in its own right, i’ll leave a link to the whole thing at the end of this post, but there’s one song that i want to focus on today, it’s a song that i have a lot of love for, and a song that i truly feel, is important to the church at large, and that song is “Sticks and Stones”
It seems every time i listen to a Kk album, there’s a song that hits me on a level that no other song can, “becoming who we are” had “light after darkness” a song that inspired the name of this blog. “Beyond control” had “a prayer” a song i still consider a turning point for worship. And “the beauty Between” has “sticks and stones” why do i think so highly of this song? Let’s look through the lyrics, and maybe you’ll understand why. Continue reading “Why “sticks and stones” by Kings Kaleidoscope is an important reminder to the modern church.”
So this wasn’t the first topic i had in mind for this weeks post, but with everything that is going on in the world right now, i think a post like this is needed. Because the state the world is in right now, i think we really need to take pride in the everlasting word of God, in a time where everything seems to be falling apart. Continue reading “Pride in the gospel in a broken world.”
Wow, it’s been a long time since i’ve done one of these, and for that i’m sorry. Other projects have gotten in the way of this series to the point where i’ve only actually done one of these, which is a shame, because if nothing else, these are great fun to create! But anyway, welcome to Everyday Worship, the series where i take a secular song, from pretty much any genre and try to find a message that speaks to us as people of faith, or glories the living God. And the first song we’re going to tackle is one that i love a lot, “Can you feel my heart?” by Bring me the horizon.
There’s a number of reasons i chose this song to bring back “everyday worship.” Not only is it one of my favourite songs, but considering the genre, it actually has a lot of lyrical content instead of being 4 minutes of vapid teenage angst, not to say that’s necessarily a bad thing, otherwise i wouldn’t be able to enjoy these sorts of songs, but it’s still nice to have a song such as this, that do have a little bit more to them, so without further ado, lets take a look at “can you feel my heart?” Continue reading “Everyday worship:Can you feel my heart?by Bring Me the Horizon.”
It’s been just over a week since i returned from New wine united 17, and like i said last week, i’d learnt a lot, not just about my faith, but about my self. The time away gave me a lot to think about who i am, my strengths, my weaknesses, my dreams, my nightmares, and everything in between. and honestly, that kind of intense reflection can be pretty scary. It made me realise how bad my insecurities actually were, even the ones i thought i’d conquered long before arriving for that wonderful week away. One such insecurity was giving a definite answer in our first main arena meeting.
Acclaimed author R. T. Kendall was leading the morning meetings, and it honestly was wonderful, and i really did learn a lot from him in the time he spent teaching us, but there’s one thing that really stood out to me, and it’s a real perspective changer. Continue reading “Thank God for unanswered prayer.”
Before i start, i just wanted to once again thank Ian for stepping in while i was away, if you haven’t read it yet i highly suggest you give it a chance it’s called A Bloke’s Struggle. and is fantastic!
it really was an amazing week away, and i’ve returned not only feeling refreshed, encouraged, motivated, but for the first time i feel like i belong. Allow me to explain. Continue reading “A sense of belonging.”
While i’m away at New wine my good friend Ian has written a brilliant piece on the book “the blokes bible” and the struggles of men in the church Continue reading A Bloke’s Struggle.
This week will be the last week on this book, and to say it’s been a journey would be an understatement. i’ve been challenged and i’ve disagreed with Mr Chan, but if his goal was to get me thinking about my relationship with God, then it’s done it’s job. Now i haven’t covered chapter 9 because it’s a chapter about other people’s stories, and honestly i don’t think it’s right for me to critique others testimonies, and because of that i won’t be covering the chapter, still, it’s worth reading if you’re interested!
This chapter isn’t the deepest in the book, but honestly i’m not sure it’s supposed to be. To me at least, this chapter is meant to be a retrospective of all the topics we’ve talked about thus far in this book. And Francis makes a great point that does really sum up the point of this book. Continue reading “Word for word: chapter 10 “the crux of the matter” and conclusion (Crazy love)”
So this year i’ll be attending week 1 of New wine’s yearly conference also known as “united” and it’s been quite a journey leading up to this point. 6 months ago i wasn’t even sure if i was going with my church this year, so the fact i’m able to shows the goodness of God and the wonderful people he has placed in my life.
Not only has the time been leading up to this been a real challenge, but it’s also been a real change of direction in my journey with the Lord. See, i wasn’t raised in the church, and there’s very few members of my family that do attend church at all, so all i’ve known is from the church i came to Christ in, which was a Church of England Anglican church with some charismatic elements, and it’s all I’ve known till fairly recently. Continue reading “Under one cross…”
It’s been a while since i wrote something on one of my favourite bands. A band that i can honestly say, has changed my perspective on what Christian music can be. And if you didn’t guess by the title, that band is Kings kaleidoscope.
I’ve written a few pieces on their music, in fact, the most viewed post on this blog was my opinion on their controversial song, “A prayer” a song that was well-known for their use of explicit language, and a song that i still see as a turning point for worship. Because it’s one of the most honest songs of actually struggling through anxiety, and in the man’s own words “That song is about the fear of running from God or that God will turn his back on me and I will end up apart from him in hell” If mentioning that fear and ending it with Jesus answering this most visceral of prayers isn’t a turning point in worship i don’t know what is! However it’s not this song we’re going to be talking about today, instead we’ll be talking about another important song from this amazing album, and why even a year on, it’s still just as important as “a prayer” for a completely different reason. Continue reading “Enchanted: how Kings kaleidoscope tapped into the modern Christian issue.”
Obsessed: To have the mind excessively preoccupied with a single emotion or topic. Continue reading Word for word: chapter 8 Profile of the obsessed (Crazy love)
Earlier this week, i actually decided to do something i never do, and went back and watched something that i was involved in, the video in question was my testimony that i shared a few weeks back. Now i didn’t go back on this out of some kind of ego trip, or to praise myself in a testimony of God’s goodness in my life. But because i felt a need to look back on this one and see what the Lord highlights to me in that video. And one thing came up that i had honestly not thought about until He showed it to me. I’ll put a link at the end just in case you’re interested in the video in question. Continue reading “Mountain top moments and everyday faith.”
This week has been a real mixed bag for me honestly. The Lord has answered my prayer for a new PC meaning i can also start some other projects relating to Life after Darkness in the near future (for more info on that say tuned in the coming weeks) along with being able to get more posts out at a more consistent rate, and i’m so grateful for that. The Lord is good, and truly wants the best for us. But this week hasn’t come with its fair share of struggles.
For the first time in a long time, i’ve been feeling like an outcast, not just with my friends, but also my family. It’s caused me to struggle with being as social as i’d normally like to be. And honestly has been making me feel on the edge, i know this is an attack, but honestly that doesn’t make it any easier to deal with, so i did what i normally do if i’m feeling like this in a service, i began to read the word. Continue reading “Though i am weak…”
The critical question for our generation—and for every generation—
is this: If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and with all the
friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and
all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties
you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no
human conflict or any natural disasters, could you be satisfied with
heaven, if Christ were not there? Continue reading Word for word: chapter 6 “when you’re in love” (Crazy Love)
So as some of you may have noticed, i didn’t do word for word last week, It’s a series that i love to write and it’ll be resuming this week, but the reason we missed a week is because of what happened on the Sunday.
I was preparing to share my testimony for the first time in a church, in front of a congregation, and to say it was nerve-racking is a huge understatement, and though it wasn’t perfect, it was one of the first times in a while i’ve genuinely proud of myself, i’ll include a link to it at the end if you’re interested. But the main reason i mention this is because i want this to be a show of the works of the lord. Continue reading “I can do all things Through Christ.”
Despite the title, this isn’t another post about a song, nor about music.But more of a personal post. Not to say any of those haven’t come from a very personal place, because i try to be as honest and as up front as i can in every post i publish. Because this blog isn’t just a blog to me. It’s not just a past time, nor a hobby, but a chance to share what the Lord has put on my heart. This blog is one of my favorite things and i pray that this comes across in every post i write, because i’m doing a disservice to every person that reads this if not.
I want to bring this up because of something the Lord has put on my heart as of late. It’s a concern that i have, it’s something that i think others may struggle with. And i hope if this also applies to you this would help you see that, we can do all things through Christ that sustains us. (Philippians 4:13) Continue reading “From the inside out…”
Before i get started, i need to explain something. I’d already written this weeks main life after darkness post before i actually read this chapter, so i had no idea what this chapter would entail. So i have to admit, it’s quite an encouragement from the Lord that he has confirmed the thoughts i had while writing monday’s post (Which you can read here Honest Christianity. ) with this chapter, going so far as using the same passages! Just wanted to clear that up before i started, now on to chapter 5! Continue reading “Word for word: chapter 5 “serving leftovers to a holy God” (crazy love)”
So anyone following my other series “word for word” knows i’m starting with the book “Crazy love” by Francis Chan, If you haven’t read this book yet i couldn’t recommend it enough, it’s a challenging yet encouraging read, i mean the first chapter has the title “stop praying” that should give you an idea of the challenges that lay ahead in this brilliant book.
The reason i bring this up is because the latest chapter entitled “profile of the lukewarm” (and you can read my take on that chapter Here) in short, it’s about what it means for us to lukewarm in our faith and when the fire in our hearts dull and it’s really got me thinking about my faith. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not caused me to doubt the Lord’s goodness, or the saving power of Jesus, or the gift of the spirit. My trust in God is as strong as ever. But it’s got me thinking more about how we as the church portray following Jesus. Continue reading “Honest Christianity.”
So this chapter is a hard verse to write about on its own merits. Not because it’s bad, or extremely complex, but Pretty much the opposite. It’s a very well written, straight forward chapter, with little space for interpretation. So this piece will be more expanding on the problems of lukewarm Christianity. This chapter starts with this quote.
“It is not scientific doubt, not atheism, not pantheism, not agnosticism, that in our day and in this land is likely to quench the light of the gospel. It is a proud, sensuous, selfish luxurious, church-going, hollow-hearted prosperity” Continue reading “Word for word: chapter 4 “profile of the lukewarm” (crazy love)”
So this weekend has been an amazing one. I was at 2017’s Big church day out for the last day, and it was brilliant. As someone who loves to worship through song (see last weeks blog for more on that Music will be my prayer.) it is a must attend event! However it’s what happened there that made me want to write this weeks post. Continue reading “Stepping up and stepping out.”
Leading up to this chapter, i knew that this would be an important one, i mean, if it’s the chapter the books named after i’d hope it’d have some great content, and that it does!
From all of the chapters i’ve read thus far, this is the one that i relate to the most. I’ve always struggled to understand why God would love someone like me, why Jesus would die for someone like me. My head understands it, but my heart struggles to accept it sometimes. So hearing about an author that i respect talk about this does mean a lot to me. Continue reading “Word for Word: chapter 3 “Crazy Love””
Music, along with writing, is my way to worship. There’s very things in this life that i love more than music. As one of my favorite bands once sang “Music the great communicator” (i’m very happy if you what song that’s from!) and i really think this has more truth than we give it credit for.
If you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time, you’d know about my love for music, the post that’s gotten the most attention on this blog is my piece on why i think that the song “a prayer” by kings kaleidoscope is a turning point in worship music, i’ve written about songs that have touched me in a way that not many things can, songs like “in Christ alone” “Before the throne” and so many more. But why is that? Why does music have such a profound effect on us as followers of Christ? Well i think i might have an answer. Continue reading “Music will be my prayer.”
Life after darkness 