So it’s been a minute since I’ve written anything, I could use this time to give many reasons that I haven’t been writing, but when I originally started this blog, it was a call, to be honest about my journey with God and finding the light after the darkness, and if I’m being honest, I’ve gotten lazy with my writing, I’ve used other things to fill my time rather than return to a ministry that I feel a calling to, yes life has been busy, but that’s no excuse.
I may have mentioned before that I think the most damaging attitude to a believer’s faith isn’t anger, it’s apathy. The spirit of “meh” will kill excitement for the wonder of God’s plans way quicker than one of anger, and it’s the spirit of “meh” that has really affected my writing as of late. That’s not to say this is in all aspects of my journey, I’m still an active churchgoer, and I love being able to lead worship in that setting, but the thing is, the spirit of apathy will spread if it is allowed to flourish in one place, and the last thing I want is to be someone that isn’t excited to see God’s splendor come to earth. and with the beginning of a new year, what better time to start fresh than now?
So, with that out of the way, why do I believe that God has called me to get back to writing, what makes me so special? and honestly, this is been the hardest bit of getting back into sharing these thoughts and the reason I feel called back. Those 5 words…
“What makes me so special?”
Anyone that has been reading these for a while or knows me fairly well knows this is one of the things that I struggle with, confidence is something I’ve had to fight to have, and even then, it’s a losing battle some days if I’m honest. I’ve really come to learn this past year that self-acceptance is a process, and as many things that I might not like about myself sometimes, I’m still someone that was made by a loving and caring God who, despite the times I’m far from the person I want to be, He still holds me up and walks with me through those times, and although I still slip up, I am not forsaken. God is good even if I’m not always.
So going back to the question “What makes me so special?” Well, My God makes me special, not my own power, or anything I have done or could do, but the fact that he has a plan for not just me, but all of us, is pretty special don’t you think? The fact that he has made each of us uniquely wonderful, that we each have different likes, dislikes, passions, hobbies, and tastes, and yet are all equally loved by a heavenly Father is incredible to me.
The thing is, I felt called to start this blog because it can feel like encouragement is in pretty short supply when you’re in that place, and rather than fall into that void, I believe that my God is good and because he is good, he has given me a chance to use those feelings of inadequacy, in turn, giving me an opportunity to examine those feelings and hopefully share some of that encouragement if you’re there with me. So let me give you a basic truth about not just you, but our wonderful God.
You are not only fearfully and wonderfully made, but you are loved, you are special and you are important. I may feel called to write, lead Worship, or whatever the Lord has next for me in the coming weeks, months, and years, but you have a calling and a purpose, and whatever that is, He will bless you in that, so if you’re at that point where you’re questioning “What makes me so special?” instead ask yourself “How could I not be special with him on my side?” Our God is love in the truest sense, and it’s that understanding that I truly hope will bring you peace in the way it has for me.
So how often will I be doing these? Honestly, it’s a good question, and I’m not entirely sure, but something I do know is when I do I’ll be doing it with an expectation of God’s Goodness to be the focus. I have a few things planned for the coming year, and this time I won’t let the spirit of apathy take the reins. but if you’ve taken the time to read this, thank you, I have missed writing and I hope this has been an encouragement for you if you’re in the same boat, may you be blessed in this new year.
Thank you for reading and May God Bless You.
Life after darkness 